The words on these pages may point to something that seems as if it is
new or unknown … however what is being pointed to … is what cannot
be learned, is always present and cannot be lost ... only hidden.
The “ego” loves to be pandered to and adored. There is nothing wrong with this … everything
has it’s time and place. However,
everyone could use a Drill Instructor from time to time (or constantly) because
in a sense The D.I. is the “ego” (who we *think* we are in this world)’s worst
nightmare and the “True Self” (that which cannot be thought)’s best
Friend. The reason The D.I. is not “your”
friend is because you cannot predict what The D.I. will do and The D.I. is the Best
Friend to the Self because the DI can predict what you do in a flash, in fact,
usually The D.I. sees what you will do ten moves ahead of where you are at.
The D.I.'s job is to break you of who you think you
are. You may want to fight The D.I. but
you know even when you do it, you don’t really want to win. You want to lose yourself and yet at the same
time are afraid of the unknown. Who you
*think* you are is like a “woobie” blanket that you had as a child … it
couldn’t really protect you from anything but it sure felt like it could. That is what the “ego/who you *think* you
are” is … it is a blanket/skin that is wrapped around “Nothing” to make it seem
like you are protected from something, but even the *something* that one thinks
they are protected from … is in Nothing.
Not “nothing” like blank … Nothing like “No Thing.” This means that in a sense there is something
there but it is nothing that you can use the senses for to understand. The “ego/ who you *think* you are” attempts
to understand everything, yet it is The D.I.'s job to remove what you have come to
understand and leave you empty(ier) of who you think you are.
You hear people all the time say … I am a smoker …
I am a drinker … I am a vegetarian … I am a meat eater … I am a man … I am a
woman … I am an alcoholic … I am a drug addict … I am a home maker … I am white
… I am black … I am Native American … I am Indian … I am Chinese … I am
Christian … I am buddhist … I am atheist … I am a husband … I am a wife … I am
a sister … I am a brother … I am a department store clerk … I am a musician … I
am a writer … I am a poet … I am an astronaut … I am an inventor … I am human …
I am (insert name here). Yet you … the
True You … are none of those things. All
of that is Secondary to who you Truly Are.
This one is lucky it actually has a Drill Sergeant
as a Teacher. Not Lucky for “me” just Lucky. This doesn’t mean that everyone should go
join the Military … though it’s a start.
When the Student is Ready … the Teacher will appear. How will you know the Teacher has appeared …
the Teacher will not pander to you. You
won’t always get what you want but you will get exactly what you need.
You don't want to underestimate the power of words. Last
night while driving down the road listening to a CD that had been mentioned in
the Newsletter there was a bit of cringing at some of the lyrics (it had taken
a good 12 full listens ... over the last few months to the CD before the words
weren't so harshly heard). This after having years of training
desensitizing to words ... that words have only the meaning we give to them.
That one take personal responsibility for how they hear something.
It is the one hearing it who is responsible for the reaction to the
words; not the one saying it. Like when one looks at a piece of Art, it
is not the Artist responsibility to reveal to you what you see or experience,
the same came up around this CD. It would be a wise teaching for children
to learn as they are being taught a language, to remember what/who they are
before the words/language. Then the possibility is there or is embedded
so that they do not think words/thoughts are who they are, rather
words/thoughts are something that has been taught to them so that they can
communicate verbally.
Something else was revealed while listening to this CD. Whether
it is known to the artist or not, his pushing the boundaries of this mind to go
past the words to hear what they are In and then to hear the words as Music and
then to return to the words (meanings) to see the picture being painted is very
revealing and this is what one would call Art, when something is able to do
this, however one must be willing to have ears to Hear it.
Again it came up that it is not the words themselves but the
energy the words ride upon, so there was a letting go (in a sense) of the
meaning (that was thought) about the words and a relaxing into the music of the
words, so that the words/lyrics themselves became Music, like an instrument
(not pictures drawn from past experience), just sound and it became quite
beautiful, you could hear the joy and the anger and the love and sadness,
without meaning. And then compassion grew. Compassion breeds
compassion. And compassion grew from Hearing this man's life, his
experience ... the Art he reveals from how life is seen through his eyes.
That he took the time to create something, to make one smile, to make
them cringe, to make them think about things that are not easy to hear, to draw
a picture with words of a life that may be difficult for some to imagine, let
alone live, to shed light on dark situations, just by speaking of them.
In this world, we are only as strong as our weakest link; that
is what is said. However, there is NO weakness in what we are
LINKED IN (no it's not a social networking club :o). The more one can
begin to become Aware of what we are Linked In (for lack of a better word
because link implies something that can be broken and what you are IN cannot be
broken), the more you come from that Space, you will, in a sense, share it in
anyway that it appears for you to do so.
So stay a bit longer when words make you feel uncomfortable.
Allow them to momentarily not mean anything at all.
It is not words that create disharmony; it's one's belief in the words.
The longer you can stay with the un-comfortableness; the more
that is revealed.
All anger
stems from things not going the way you “think” you want them too. It is
very simple to see when you are not “angry.” But like the definition
above, if you have been offended, believed to be wronged, or denied something
you want, sometimes it will lead to retaliation. However, anger is a gift
that one can use to begin to know theirSelf. When you are angry, it can
be quite a challenge to see that the only reason you are angry is because you
cannot control or manipulate the situation to reflect what you want it to be.
But you can right now begin to use anger as the gift of recognizing that
you are not in control, but something, that is not a something...IS.
When it
arises here it starts as things do not go as “planned” like this morning there
was an intention to get immediately to work on the Tidbit after Meditation but
that didn’t happen because the website wasn’t loading and then there was an
error on adobe flash player and then a mistake made in correcting it that
deleted the object. So there was this feeling in the pit of the stomach
that starts to grow, it is coming up right now because my dog Pete is licking his
paw, now you would think that wouldn’t bring up anger, but for some reason it
does. I want to make him stop doing that. So this feeling again
arises in the pit of my stomach, but I know to watch it and not react.
But the feeling does not “feel good.” I want both the licking and the
feeling to go away. But I know that the true gift comes in not trying to
change any of it. To experience the sensation that is called “anger.”
What it
actually is and the true gift that comes to be seen, is that one does not like
to not have control and anger comes as a gift to show that you do not have
control. You cannot control other people, you cannot control what is
happening around you and you in all truth, have no control over yourself.
As you begin to sit with anger, let it come up and just pay attention to
it. Let the stomach be uncomfortable. Let the annoyance be
there. You may react or you may not, but start watching whether you do
react or whether you sit with it. Let it rise…sometimes it will grow to a
great height (depending on how much you want control).
If you are
wise, you will begin to let go of the “wanting” to have control, because that
is what anger is … a “wanting” for things to be some other way than what they
are. But can you see how futile that is, if thing are just the way they
are, then what is the point of getting angry. The point LOL and maybe one
shouldn’t give all the gifts away, but the point, ultimately, is to begin to
show you that you are not doing it, you have not ever done anything in your
entire life (not the “you” that you think you are). The REAL “YOU” has
been living life and revealing life to you and you have identified with the
thought about what is revealed as “you.” But you are not a thought, nor
are you an emotion, but thoughts and emotions can begin to point you towards
who you TRULY Are.
When you
honestly see that you do not have control, and that anger is a gift that comes
to reveal to you that you are not in control. Then you may begin to relax
into what IS in control, and just see how it will all play out…right in front
of you, as it always has, but now you will be aware of it in a diferent
way. Not from trying to make things happen or thinking that you make
things happen, but from actually watching what happens. Like at the
movies when you are engrossed in the movie, you sometimes want to tell the
movie to do something you think will be best for all involved in the movie, but
the movie has already been written so your wants don’t change it, such is the
movie of LIFE in front of your eyes as you read this. It is already
written and you are watching it played out. You can pass the popcorn as
you watch it, you can talk about what a great movie it is or isn’t (but please
keep it down a notch so others can hear and see it too), but you cannot change
it. You can get angry at the movie for not doing what you want it to, or
being too long or not long enough, but the show must go on, because it is
already written and anger can be seen as futile or it can be felt as real, as
if you were on a ride that is interactive (which it is) but having an
interactive ride still doesn’t give you control. Like when Madden put the
interactive joystick on the football game…it gave you a bit more feeling of
being in the game…such is the body…it gives you a feeling of being in the game,
but just like with Madden Football, you are not in the game, because you are
not the body/joystick, you are watching it, watching the playing out the part
that has already been programed into the game and so all you get to do really,
is watch and feel like you are playing.
So anger, use
it as a gift to see “Who” is using the "you" you think you are ... to
play the game.
THE 13TH FLOOR: The following trailer is from a movie that is a fun pointer (not actual) to what was shared above. It has a lot of holes, but it makes one open to many possibilities of the way things can be seen. It's worth watching the movie if you like the trailer.
This
is a pretty radical jump for some, though the more one is willing to look at it
as an actuality, the more it can be Seen.
Let's
use an example of when you first meet someone. You may say
"hello" and your first thoughts are "what a nice person"
but you have only just said hello. Then you look at their pants and there
is a rip and you think "oh they must be poor" then they say something
that you don't agree with and you may think "oh well we don't have
anything in common" and then they might tell you something else about
their life and you think "oh I love this person."
This
happens all the time doesn't it? Don't you find yourself flip flopping
between
good
thoughts and bad thoughts about everything that appears before you? But
thoughts only have the meaning that you give to them. Only you can say
what thought you think is good and what thought you think is bad about anything
that appears before you.
What
you are being pointed towards here, is that no matter what you think...it is a
lie.
Thoughts
are lies, because they do not reflect Truth. Truth cannot be thought.
Once
this is Seen you will begin to experience each moment as it actually is, not
how you think it is or how you think it should be. This happens by no
longer believing what you think is true and being willing to be wrong about
what you think about anything and everything.
How
can you verify that anything that you just read is True and not just more
thoughts (which they actually are however, they are thoughts that Point to
Truth)? You can do this by beginning to watch your thoughts. As you
pay attention to what you think, you may begin to see that "thoughts"
cannot be in the present moment, they are always about the past or the
future. To be in the present moment you cannot think about it, because each
thought moves you out of the moment you are in to describe it to you.
Like if you are looking a tree, you are just seeing it, but the moment you
think "oh the tree is brown" it is about what you have seen not what
you are seeing. This may not be clear at first, however it will be if you
continue to watch your thoughts, paying attention to what you think, but not
believing it, because even when you say the tree is brown...what is
brown? Really isn't that just a word we picked out of any combination of
letters to agree that when we see what we "think" is that color we
can share the experience of the color, but how do we even know our eyes see the
same color, when all we are actually doing is agreeing on a word about a
color. This may seem complicated at first but it becomes very, very
simple, when one stops believing and eventually even paying attention to the
thoughts and begins to just SEE.
Ultimately
it does not matter if you see this, because life happens in spite of what you
or anyone thinks about it. That is the good news.
