Who Am I? Really.

This is a question that no one can answer for you.  The question of "Who Am I?"  If you have found yourself at this page then the odds are you have begun to question reality and your role in it.  There has been a very big assumption and that assumption that has been made is that you exists and you know who you are.  However this assumption is being questioned or you wouldn't be here.  So what you have come here for is the question:

"Who Am I?"

Ask yourself and see what comes.  You may at first find that the answers that come say...I am "insert name here."   If you can look at the statement you may see the lie.  If you have put in a name ... like we can use the example of Jane/you...so we put in the name Jane/you to have "I am Jane."  Now look again...who is calling Jane...Jane?  (<----don't speed past this one :o)

This can blind one from looking at "I."  Because there is so much investment in the story around a name "I/Jane."  Some thoughts from the past or about the future that are saying "I/Jane must be because I remember her."  Who remembers her...now don't get caught in the thought that says "I" do because again...Who is saying "I do."  At first it maybe frustrating...then the question can come from that too..."Who is Frustrated."

It takes a commitment to continue to ask.  If you see thoughts come and have changed from Who to How/Why...refocus them to Who...begin to use Who when thoughts say "I."  It sounds too simple.      The mind insists on complexity to avoid what is so close, that complexity is in It.  However, you will be following the thoughts back to the Present and the Present cannot be thought. So now the first question has been answered...I am not Jane.  I/Jane is a name and names can be changed, it is unchangeable, unalterable.  So we come to find that "I"  am not (insert name here) who I think I am.   Then "Who Am I?  Really."

The next answer that comes maybe something like (and take a moment to look/pause and see if you can begin to see where that answer came from).

If  the answer that came is something like... I am this body.  Investigate...It sure can feel like the body is who we are...however...if you look closely...if you are the body...could it be taken from you?  If you were/are  it...and you lose part of it...like an arm or a leg, do you lows a part of yourself?  Could you be without it?  The body will die...eventually something will kill it even if it is old age.  So if you are able to see that you are not the body, again the investigation arises...if I am not the body...who am I?

The questions will continue to come...look at them...begin to ask "Who is aware of this?" To whom do these thoughts come?  Do the thoughts that show up actually reveal who you are or do they only reveal who you are not.  If it can change...then it is not who you are?

What Do I Know For Myself?

Is Everything Just A Reflection of itSelf?

I was told by my Teacher to do introspection on what I know for myself. To look and see if everything that I think I know...hasn't come from somebody else and that I have taken that information as truth and grown my own branches off of it and now say that I know something.

First, the main question is "Who am I?" and all other questions arise from the lack of investigation of that one question.

I know for myself...from investigation, that "I" "me" is a lie. In contemplation and meditation and in asking the question "Who am I?" there has yet to be an "I" that has revealed itself as something tangible. In all the searching all that has been found are thoughts that say that "I" exists. Where Descartes said "I think therefore I am." What has been revealed here is..."I" is a thought, and thought is not "real/tangible" so "I" do not exist...except as thought.

I am not a body, nor am I a woman, nor am I anything that I can tangibly explain to anyone...not even myself...who asks the questions...Who Am I?

Who is it that has inquired about the "I"?

So I do not know who I am...thoughts continue to come and say "I am this...I am that" and that is where I am but not who I am. I have sat here for years now...flipping back and forth thinking that I understand something and then recognizing that there has been another trapped laid and fallen for.

The quiet deepens here and there is an awareness that there is a pull more and more towards meditation...not for a purpose... just finding myself sitting quietly again for more than what once was and it is not to gain anything or to advance anywhere. It is as if the mind craves the rest.

This is a far as this will go this evening.

Sweet Dreams.

~Joysters

WHAT DO I KNOW FOR MYSELF?

I was told by my Teacher to do an introspection on what I know for myself. To look and see if everything that I think I know...hasn't come from somebody else and that I have taken that information as truth and grown my own branches off of it and now say that I know something.

First, the main question is "Who am I?" and all other questions arise from the lack of investigation of that one question.

I know for myself...from investigation, that "I" "me" is a lie. In contemplation and meditation and in asking the question "Who am I?" there has yet to be an "I" that has revealed itself as something tangible. In all the searching all that has been found are thoughts that say that "I" exists. Where Descartes said "I think therefore I am." What has been revealed here is..."I" is a thought, and thought is not "real/tangible" so "I" do not exist...except as thought.

I am not a body, nor am I a woman, nor am I anything that I can tangibly explain to anyone...not even myself...who asks the questions...Who Am I?

Who is it that has inquired about the "I"?

So I do not know who I am...thoughts continue to come and say "I am this...I am that" and that is where I am but not who I am. I have sat here for years now...flipping back and forth thinking that I understand something and then recognizing that there has been another trapped laid and fallen for.

The quiet deepens here and there is an awareness that there is a pull more and more towards meditation...not for a purpose... just finding myself sitting quietly again for more than what once was and it is not to gain anything or to advance anywhere. It is as if the mind craves the rest.

This is a far as this will go this evening.

Sweet Dreams.

~Joysters

Who Am I?

The only question that ever need be asked is "Who Am I?" It is not a question that you ask and then just agree with the thoughts that come that say "I am me" "I am male" "I am female" those thoughts will come...so will the thoughts to tell you that you are a mother, a father, a son, a daughter...this is not a question that is answerable by the mind/thoughts and the mind/thoughts are what have been relied upon to explain to you who you are.

This is deeper than what the mind/thoughts can offer and if you sit with the question "Who Am I" not expecting an answer...not demanding to understand...but ask the question and then wait...wait and put your attention on the stillness that is not thought.

Continue deeper past the thoughts of who you are, what you do for a living or what your opinions are...what you look like, what you value...what country you are from...this is not about the identity you have created in the world.

Is what you have found...true...or is it just a story that you have told for so long that you think it is who you are.

If you think you know who you are and there lies any possibility that who you have found yourself to be...can be taken from you...then how can it be who you are?

This isn't to drive one crazy...though it can if you believe what you hear in the mind...this is where something deeper in you begins to speak and there isn't a language I know of that can speak it...yet once it is heard...within this paradox...you know it...you may not be able to explain it...but anyone that knows it...knows when one has glimpsed itself.

This moment you are offered the opportunity to investigate with integrity and resolve "Who am I?"

~Joysters

Already Awake

You Are What You Have Been Searching For

It's 3:02am and I just woke up from a strange dream where we were humans in a war and there were not that many people left on earth...and of the ones that were left there were three types ...one type was the Stupid people (that's what they were called in my dream)...they were attempting to kill the people/bodies in the dream that knew that the world was not real ... (those people were called the Real Ones) they were the ones that Knew the world was not real and were here to spread that information to those that could Hear...they were sort of protected (in a sense) by the Protectors...the Protectors were those that believed in what the Real Ones revealed about the world not being real... but didn't yet Know...without the need for belief ....that the world was not real.

So there were sort of 3 types of people in my dream tonight and the first type the Stupid ones were angry and brutal...sometimes so subtley so you wouldn't know (unless you were a Real One) that they were actually a Stupid one...yet when they got info about one of the Real One's that knew that the world was not real...they would erupt in rage and attack and destroy anyone that was even remotely linked to the Real One's.

There was a woman in my dream that could explain easily...how the world was not real...but she could only explain half of it...and then there was another that could explain the other half...and if you were in the presence of the two...explaining the one...it became so obvious that the world was not real...that you instantly became One of the Real Ones.

Then I woke up.

~Joy Surget

The Game

How about looking at life like a computer game...

The game reveals to you ways to keep the game going like clues that lead you places in the game...keep you entranced and feeling like you are getting somewhere in the game...cause in a way you are...you get to go to the next level if you crack certain challenges...that's what challenges in a computer game do...but they don't really get you anywhere...your still sitting in your chair playing a game as if you have accomplished something...but that is the prize that is overlooked...you win in the game sure...but the Player...You...have not moved nor gained anything that wasn't there before you started playing.

If you've ever played a computer game...you first of all know...that everything that you are going to do in the game has already been set up for you and done...tested by its Creator and signed and sealed...in a sense the game is already over before you start playing and there is nothing you can do about that...but knowing this doesn't make you any better or less for playing...you bought the game to play it.

One of my favorites games for a while was Grand Theft Auto Vice City...good graphics...you can sort of feel like you are driving the car around in the game...good music...so I played for hours...watched my friends and family play and watched them use cheat codes to get all this extra cool stuff that is hidden in the game.... used information that is in the game to "seemingly" get places and win points...and this to me is such a good example of looking at life...cause it is set up to look like our so-called reality and is such a cool pointer as to see that maybe life as we think it is...how real we think it is...really isn't what we think it is...

A way to say this right now...is this body is a Joystick (no pun intend) :o) and You are playing a game but you don't have any real choices...cause it's all already set up...your choices are limited to the game. There aren't any real levels even though in this world it looks like their are...it keeps it entertaining.

Well if I had a point in typing it I am beginning to forget now.

Oh Yes...

You are already Awake and no one can tell you that (even though I just did)...no one can make you believe it (it's beyond belief) You know it...whether you resist, deny or preach It...It IZ.

Signed, sealed and delivered :o)))) 

~Joysters

A Story About The Search

Once upon a time, there was a person who had been searching and searching for Truth to an essential experience that had shattered its world.

It climbed to the top of mountains, it looked in the eyes of many, it called out in the day and in the night, who, who is there, who is this that is calling me, who, who, who...it looked in books, it studied so hard, and learned so much, and yet the answer always evaded it.

Then one day, after looking and searching, it grew angry, it's them, it's not me, it's them that have caused all this confusion that keeps me from my essential experience...I will go out and show them that they are the cause of my suffering...and for years, it rants, it raves, it curses and it preaches the words that it thinks will lead it Home it has imagined is awaiting its return.

It question changes from who to how...how, how, how can this be...how can no one see what I see, how come I suffer so.  How come people do not fulfill my desire, work does not fulfill my desire, books do not tame this craving this thirst.

A teacher, that's what I will be...a teacher for God until I realize I am that. I will prove to them that I am a teacher and once they see it I must certainly see it too...so it goes out and teaches all that it has learned, it's smart and it's clever, and it's sneaky and it's proud.

Yet, there is still this craving, still this desire, I think I have fooled them all yet still I am not fooled. My frustrations are suffocating me and I am tired and I am becoming bitter and old.

The thought appears again...Who? Who is tired? Who is bitter? Who is frustrated? Who is the old soul? Something is seen...

it Stops....

it looks.

The how comes again...how can it be that there is no one here. Again, it Stops.

A smile creeps upon its face...a laughter is heard throughout the land. And a song is heard being sung...

Don't worry...
'bout a thing.
'Cause every little thing...
is gonna' be all right :o)
The End...The Beginning...