My Teacher used to say to me “And that’s a
thought.” When I would come to him with all these thoughts that seemed so
important and it would stun me momentarily. Sometimes I would wonder how
he could say that to the important information that was going to impact my life
and the lives around me and he could be so calm and although he would listen to
my plight, he would eventually again point to me and say “And that’s a thought
too.” And he would smile and I would frown and stomp away wondering “what
have I done wrong that I don’t see” (not seeing that that was just a thought
too).
He did this for many years, I would come to
him again and again with problem after problem and in his infinite patience, he
would listen or he would do whatever the moment called for which sometimes was
a scolding or a praise, there was not a time, even to this day that I could
predict what he would/will do, but that is another of His Great
Teachings. Many times I would go thinking I would get a praising, only to
hear I had done something wrong, and then other times thinking I would get the
scolding of my life, only to find him praising me for something I had
done. This over time became the blessed teaching of “not
knowing.”
Which leads to the title of today
“Thinking.” Thinking is knowing, even if you don’t know ... you think you
can know by thinking. But thinking is not real…it is not part of
reality. See these words come on the screen by the fingers not by
thinking. This is not always easy for one to see, for like I shared
above, I knocked on my Teachers door with question after question and problem
after problem, until one day the draw to Stillness became the Answer.
Even in moments now there is “thinking” and there is thinking that there
was/is an answer and there is …but the answer is in Stillness/Silence.
Now that can be even more infuriating to the
mind that wishes to know reasons and answers for all things … to hear that they
are all answered in Stillness, is to negate the “mind/thoughts.” Again it
all boils down to a frown or a smile, sometimes even a laugh or a punch in the
face…depends on how serious one is in knowing answers.
Since life is just happening and all you get
to do is watch it, then living with unanswered questions is actually the
gift. To let things be as they are and watch as them appear is the gift
and the answers do come, not in your time or your way, but naturally they
appear. Recently, a Friend of mine said she stays informed on my life through
the writings I send her, and I wrote that I was annoyed because how do I stay
informed on her life when I don’t receive any writings from her. Then lo’
and behold, she appears on the street the very next day sharing with me what is
going on in her life. (((Smiles)))
Be willing to be surprised. I know
sometimes it doesn’t seem easy to do … especially since the thoughts usually
say you know what is going to happen and it’s not going to be good. But
see how silly it is to think that you know the answer and that the answer
“isn’t going to be good” wouldn’t it just be better to wait and see ... if the
alternative is shitty anyway :o)
All you have to do is look at that your life
has worked out perfectly this far, you are reading this right now and all is
well right :o) Even if you are thinking it is not LOL!
